Holy Mother Of Fuck :Part One

I Fucked Ann Coulter in the Ass, Hard

I would have thought that you'd need an industrial sized lazer like the one Auric Goldfinger used to nearly cut James Bond's nuts off to invade that svincter.
This made me giggle like a schoolgirl in my room at 2am in the morning.

Brilliant!

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Elliot Smith concert@ Unfinished

His life ended way too soon, found this concert online and thought I'd pass it along. Good quality.

click here

...And So It Begins, Batman.

I have just read the article on 'Batman Begins' in the latest issue of Entertainment Weekly this evening. It left me with a sense of euphoria and a warm feeling in my stomache. I've been following the progress of this film for a long time. I'm a dyed in the wool Batman fan, I've been reading his books since...before I could read actually haha. It's important to me that the film does justice to the source material. Well friends, it looks like this one will Not Suck.
I, like many people, would love nothing more than to see Joel Shumacher thrown from a tall building with fish line w/ hooks wrapped around his small entestine and watch him unravel for 30 stories for what he did to the Batman films. He made Adam West's Batman look alot less embarrassing. If I saw Joel in person I would spit in his face, then ask for my $14.00 (both movies) back.
This one, Batman Begins, has got the Nuts my friends. Mark my words. I remember watching the first matinee of Tim Burton's Batman and leaving the theatre with goose bumps up both my arms. If Batman Begins gives me even half of that it will have done it's job.

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Dennis Miller, a shadow of his past self.....

DENNIS MILLER (2003): Let me explain …

DENNIS MILLER (1988): Firing Line … you're on cable more than hotel porn. And it says here that you've been spewing conservative rhetoric at a rate that would make Joe McCarthy choke on his noon hoagie. It says here that, on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, you said: "George Bush has allowed us to respect the presidency again." Is this my future? Is this the promise of all those hard years at a low-level state university? (Looks under bed) And am I still wearing white socks with loafers?!


This is brilliant, I thought I was the oly one to notice..

THE MILLER'S CROSSING.

Love songs of a doomed life

I have been floating in limbo as of late. I still haven't heard from my current employer about coming back from work. Some paperwork error or something else vile and mysterious. I spend most days sleeping (or at least attempting) 'til noon. Surfing the web for the news I care about and .jpgs of porn. Going for long walks to the bookstore to look at magazines and books I can't afford to buy. Watching the SF Giants suck they're way though 9 innings of pisspoor baseball hoping and praying to the sporting gods that Barry Bonds comes to save the day. Hell, I wish for the same thing too. I may be the only person who likes Barry Bonds. People only boo because the Giants are out of town. Their opinion means nothing. Fuck them.
I tell myself I need to be creative, even if it seems hopeless. My whole life seems hopeless as of late. The love is gone and sometimes I wonder if that was just a lie I told myself and was unfortunate enough to share with someone else.
I'm bone-dog tired, yet I always have trouble sleeping at night. It's too quiet and my mind comes alive to fill it with stuff. I can't sleep in the day because it's too noisy. Back on the east coast we had either the fan or the air on and the noise was loud and I got used to it. I would sleep hard because I had to. I got my mind in that zone. And it helped matters that I was getting laid. I would sleep even when the woman snored like a felled wildabeast, it was a tribute to my survival skills getting through the summer months there. The heat was unbearable.
I had a long rambling talk with a friend from the east coast on instant messenger the other night. We talked sports, and about old times. I tried to make with the funny haha to fill the scroll. I almost thought he might be an imposter. My ex lying in wake ready to scream at me for going to strip clubs behind her back with my friends at work. She hated the thought of me looking at any woman other that her, and would become a shrill harpy about any percieved or otherwise glances. I would become a neurotic mess about her hacker skills, she having used those skills to break into several of my e-mail accounts thinking me a web-lothario. God I hated her as much as I loved her sometimes.
I have one local friend I talk to since I've come home. Most people here have their head burrowed up their own asses and problems they have no time for people the likes of me. I'm not pretty or very witty in person and too damn shy to get laid. But this is nothing new.

Enough indulgence and self pity for one night,

D-

Quotes of interest

Science and Education

"The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking."
-- Albert Einstein, Out of My Later Years

"It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data."
-- Arthur Conan Doyle, (Sherlock Holmes, Scandal in Bohemia, 1891)

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Comic Book Rant Part 1

I have collected comics for it seems all my life. Through thick and thin they are one of the constants of my life. I'm primarily a DC Comics fan but I've read everything at one time or another. Indys, Marvel, anything that was good at the time.
When you do something for an extended period of time you form your own opinions about the thing that you love.
Let's Start,
When I read a comic about a certain character, let's say Batman for a good example, I buy the damn comic to read about Batman. If it's a superhero team-book, like The Avengers, you can focus on any member of the group and get away with it. You can read an issue about The Beast and Wonderman on a road trip across New York State looking for the cinnamon Girl. Or Giantman and the Wasp shagging like crazed aardvarks for 26 pages. It doesn't matter. It could be a good read. Why Not?
But let's say the book has the name Batman on the cover. It stars Batman. He is presumably the star of the book. Big letters on the cover. He sells the book. As he should. Because HE'S FUCKING BATMAN, right?
Okay, let's say I'm douche bag indy comic book writer (not that all indy comic book writers are douche bag, just this one in particular). I get the chance to write for the big company that publishes Batman, Superman, etc. Mainstream characters, Iconic stuff that will be around long after I'm gone and the Republican have scorched the earth looking for the last bit of fossil fuel. Anyway, said writer lands a comic with one of these characters in it.
Now if it were me, I would cherish the thought of writing for my favorite character. Sure it's work-for-hire. Sure I don't own shit when I'm done. But to have the chance to put my mark on the Icon that I love would make me giddy. Make my Geek Heart weep with joy. Playing with the best toy in the toybox.
Okay, said writer lands a dream job, best toy in the box. The front of the book says BATMAN, who would you think said writer would write about?
No, think again.
Bruce Wayne's female Bodyguard.
Whoops, said bodyguard finds out he's Batman.
Huh? What?
Her POV the entire time.
Admittedly some people felated all over this. But they were people WHO DIDN'T READ BATMAN BOOKS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Anyway, the bottom line IMO, if you're going to write a book about Superman, Batman, Wonderwoman, write about the main character. Call the book "The Adventures of Bruce Wayne's Boyguard". Otherwise it's a waste of my fucking time.
If you're writing a Star Trek story about Kirk, Spock and McCoy don't write about some Ensign on deck 11. Again, it's a waste of my fucking time. Call the Book "The Adventures of Ensign Kelso, Hypospray Cleaner". I don't care what you call it, just call it WHAT IT IS.
End of sermon, for now.
D-

hope is overrated

I had a job interview today at a bank. Well, not exactly a job interview, a teller's test. I sat in the waiting room with a sweet girl who was also taking the test. I guestimated she was prabably in her early 20's, beautiful blonde, vivacious, a red sweater that had a scoop-neck that couldn't contain pointy full breasts. She talked to me, which in my view, made my last couple of months. I was nervious as shit, even with an old friend from Target helping give the test. I talked up to and after the test, like 60 miles an hour. It was a test on teller related functions. Counting out money, but we were being timed. I Hate That. I know I probably flunked it. Even with a beautiful girl and two fellow geeks in the room. I was so fucking nervious counting imaginary money no less. I felt like i was going so slow, filling out that application before and after the test. God I can be such a dork.
Some people want to believe that god exists and he looks out for everyone like Superman patrolling the skies of Metropolis. I think of the times I screamed in my head for 'god' to help me, to ease my pain from my life in Baltimore coming apart at the seams. One night I just burst into tears, like they where shooting from a fire hydrant. "he is not listening, he's not there. there is no god." I still believe that to this day even when the pain is stitching over a bit. In a way it's comforting, it's like one question has been answered. I can go on.
Even when the God-Heads who have our govt, in their thrall spouting anyway they can about so-called moral values. God, jesus, and religion are for people who have nothing or everything. The people who want something or want to keep something. Nobody thanks god/jesus when they lose the big game or get hit by a bus. They blame themselves. Why not cut out the middle diety?

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Go Team Venture Season Two!!

Publick Nuisance

"..and so it is official...The Venture Bros. has been picked up for another season of 13 episodes! Having been forced to sit on this information for a week or two, it's nice to tell you all finally."

Official Site Here

How William Shatner Went From Has-Been to Icon in Seven Self-Aware Steps

How William Shatner Went From Has-Been to Icon in Seven Self-Aware Steps

"The TV success coincides with raves for his cheekily titled album, Has Been, produced by indie star Ben Folds. In a gesture of playful defiance, Shatner, age 73, ends an L.A. concert with “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds”—a nod to Transformed Man—then raises a fist. Then flips the bird."

Shatner 3:16 says I just drop kicked your ass!

Porn Addiction Survey

I am 75% addicted to Porn. What about you?